woke to find pain laid on a bare bed with me,
so near, his head, cut in pale
stone, was my head,
his brain my brain,
and I could not resign my thoughts
to that proximity.
He was so close a company he felt like loneliness.
tried at length to know a door to make him leave by,
bribe to make him go,
but oh my dear, he grins
from everywhere I look,
at everything I do.
I meet his image where I once met you.
He feeds at every
meal, beckons down every street
and yet could not withstand
of your hand.
back to me soon. I am changing without you.
My mind turns cold and luminous
like a moon.
Keys, coins, receipts accumulate in my pockets.
I grow calm
and brutal on beer and thick meat.